Who Are Your Bookends?

I was at the cemetery with my friend Don yesterday as he tended to his family’s plots on this Memorial Day weekend.  My dog Red was having a blast running around and I was just watching it all and taking it all in.  I thought about my family members who are deceased and how they made me who I am today.  I also thought about how much of who I am comes from those before me and from my children: like bookends of influence in my life. So, ask yourself this: who are your bookends?  Who holds you up and helps you stand tall?  Who, no matter whether they are here on this earth or not,  are your imaginary pillars?

Children, Mother, Grandmother?

Of course, I am over the moon proud of my children.  We all are, right?  I can’t believe I have a daughter who is a doctor.  Really, I can’t believe it.  I can’t believe that I have a son who graduated from an Ivy League university.  Again, can’t believe it.  I have a son who works in the entertainment industry in Los Angeles, which was his dream.  Again, not on my radar when I was young.   I tell you about them for this reason only: I do not come from a fancy family. The word Ivy League was not in our vocabulary.  “I made my own curtains,” was more likely to be heard in my household.  But when I write about the accomplishments of my children, I feel fancy!  Proud and fancy.

Now, focusing backward, my thoughts about my Mom and my Grannie bring up words like strength, creativity, humor, and love, love, love.  And my Mom got that from her Mom.  and Grannie got it from Grand-Grannie.  All of that strength and beauty and hard work was handed to me on an imaginary silver platter.  “Here, take this and run with it.”  I am so lucky to have had them.

Now, as I look at my life as a single woman after 32 years of marriage, I know that I could not be who I am without everything I learned from the women before me or everything I have learned as the mother of my children.  I have such strong “bookends” to hold me upright, to give me the structure that I need to not only live a productive life but a happy life.  It makes me feel strong.  With the strength of the past and the promise of the future in front of me, those bookends will not let me fail.

Thank you to those who have gone before and to those who are moving forward.  Thank you for being my bookends.  Happy Memorial Day!