I had a conversation last week with one of my closest friends about our work life, home life and what they look like moving forward. She is married, I am not. After we parted I realized something that had escaped me to this point: we honestly have many of the same issues in our 60+ lives. I truly thought that my issues were particular to single women about 60-70, and some may be, but we have many of the same thoughts rolling around in our heads.

My friend said to me, “This is a hard time of life. Everybody I know is grappling with whether or not they should make a career change or ride it out or retire or get a new job all together. She’s right. This is a complicated time in our lives and it is unexpected for me.

When I was first divorced, I guess I thought I would ride my life out as planned, creating content for single women over fifty and working with women to help them make their lives look like their visions. I love doing this and I hope I get to do it forever. But, I pay my own health insurance and maybe I should be thinking of adding another “gig” to my schedule in order to have that covered. And, I’m not sure that I wouldn’t enjoy more interaction with live human beings, since much of my “socializing” is actually online through social media.

My friend was communicating that she might like a job that was a little more fulfilling for her. Or would she? She carries the health insurance for her whole family, and wondered if that is worth sticking it out for a while. Add to that the fact that she isn’t ready to hang up her working shoes when she turns 65. How did things get this complicated.

When I was married, I was always worried about retirement for my husband. He wasn’t someone who I thought would ever retire: his only hobby was golf. The thought of him not leaving the house in the morning had me sweating bullets! And, we had nothing in common, so I can’t imagine what that would have even looked like. I always saw myself working at something forever and I always saw him working forever. I just did. That didn’t necessarily mean employment, but I don’t think I am an at-home kind of girl anymore.

But, when I became single, my outlook changed forever. Continuing to work might be a necessity rather than an option. I guess it didn’t hit me that my married friends were in the same boat. Or, might choose to be in that same boat because they aren’t ready to throw in the towel either. Some don’t feel like they have as much money as they thought they would and want to add to their nest egg. Some want to do something different. Some want to be more fulfilled for the next ten years. Whatever it is, we are all finding ourselves a little off balance and not knowing which direction to face.

So, it’s not just me who feels the pinch of being in my sixties and not knowing what should come next. And it’s not just single women over 50 who are looking forward with big question marks in their eyes. All of us girls are looking for clarity as we gaze into the future. We all wish we had a crystal ball. I Sure do!

Maybe, there will just never be a time when any of us feel settled with our plans for the future, single or not. Is that OK? Let me know what you think.