Make your bed? Why? Well here’s why: for a while, I stopped making my bed. Why bother? And, I would leave the dishes in the dishwasher, washed, and just used them straight from there. Laundry, why fold it and put it away when I can just pull it right out of the dryer and put it on? I was turning into a lazy, who cares, frat boy, apartment dweller.
So what has changed? Nothing really, but now I know that those little things matter. They actually matter to my mood and energy from the beginning to the end of my day. Think about how it feels to get into a bed that has been made vs. how it feels to get into a bed where the pillows are already squished and you have to look for the top sheet hidden under the covers at the bottom of the bed. The reason we put our clothes away from the dryer is because they are now folded and neater and not as wrinkled. And, we put our clean dishes away because we need a place to put our dirty dishes, right?
I learned that the best part of keeping things orderly, even if no one else is around is that it’s not for other people to judge, it is for my enjoyment, my contentment, my mood. As I open the door to enter, I am not hit in the face with messiness and laundry that needs to be put away and dishes that are still in the sink or dishwasher. It is perfect just for me.
I also noticed that even though I love lots of scented candles, and I wasn’t burning them often because no one else is there to enjoy them. Well, guess what sister, now I burn them all the time because I like them and I like the way they smell. And, I have removed the plastic from the sofas (just kidding about that).
I liken it to the question, “Who do you dress for, men or women?” “Who do you keep your surroundings for, company or yourself?”
I am not a neat freak by a long shot but I have found that when I keep my place orderly, even if no one else sees it, I see it and it makes me happy.
I laughed about the plastic on the sofa. I have a neighbour who has kept the plastic on her TV screen for the past five years so that it won’t get scratched. Seriously, I swear this is true.
Yes, it’s about doing it for YOU, making your home comfortable for YOU. About being kind to yourself
Plastic on the TV would be like keeping your cell phone in the box! You are so right, life now is all about doing things the way I like them. I am not saying that I don’t miss some of the chaos that a full house of family used to bring, but for my day-to-day, I love having my own little corner of the world my way. Thank you for reading and if you like Starting Over at Sixty then please tell your friends.
Thanks for celebrating life as a mature single. I too am in that state. I have a smaller house I bought after the D. Love it. I have Dogs, who keep me company and do things with them and without.
I get the difference in maintenance living alone. Now you can set the standard you want. Great!!!!
Thanks for sharing your insight. You are absolutely right, now you can live the way you want to in our own space and for me, that is very freeing. However, I now have no one else to blame for the mess!
You are so right about setting your own standards for the way you live. Let’s face it, many of us have been cleaning up after one or two or three or four people for most of our adult lives. Honestly, the little bit that I do to keep my surroundings the way I like them is nothing in comparison. And, I am not talking about being a neat freak, I am just saying that my place is how I like it now. Hmmm, that seems to be the metaphor for my life! Thanks for reading and please tell your friends about Starting Over at Sixty if you like it.
Thank you for this! It is a great reminder to make an effort to take care of ourselves, especially after having taken care of our children for so long. Love you xo
I make my bed every morning. I enjoy housework, just don’t have a lot of it anymore since the children are grown. But I keep things straight because it makes me feel good but at the same time, if I don’t feel like doing it…I don’t …it’s my house…my life. Lol. What I am trying to come to terms with is all the yard work. I have 2 acres. It takes a lot of time to keep it under control..but I do a lot of the mowing with a push mower for the exercise. I am toying with idea of moving to an apartment or condo…but I also raise little Yorkshire Terriers, so I have to consider that love. I love them so!! Decisions!!!!
You are absolutely right, if you don’t feel like making it you don’t have to. That is the beauty of being where we are in life. However, as I say that I am thinking about the fact that I didn’t make my bed before I left this morning because I had laundry on it that needed to be folded. The shame! So what will I do? Tonight, when I get home I will fold the laundry then make the bed then watch TV for a while then get in bed! I know it doesn’t matter but it just feels better to me getting into a made bed. As for your Yorkies, there is no better dog in the world to have in an apartment or condo. And you can take them for long walks to get your exercise in. I loved my house and wasn’t given a choice if I wanted to get divorced, but my dog and I have really adapted and now he loves his walks because they give him treats at every business along the way. Thank you for reading and please pass Starting Over at Sixty along to any of your friends who you think would enjoy it.
Hi Paula, I love your blog and you have some wonderful tips! I’m in a very tricky situation where I am separated from my husband but still living in the family home. I totally agree about doing those little things that bring a smile to your face like keeping things tidy and buying candles. I live as a single person and try to spoil myself daily. As women we often forget about ourselves after years of caring for others. Fresh flowers, massages and using beautiful china and glassware feels decadent too. I am responsible for my own life on every level- and I love it! Hopefully soon I will have my own space as well! Deb
Deb, it sounds like you are doing everything you can to feel special. Good for you. It had never occurred to me that I would not be living in my house and I was terrified at the thought of moving into an apartment, but it did help me say goodbye to my old life and move forward. You will have that feeling someday as well, I just know it. It may have been your marital home, but for now, it is YOUR home and should reflect that, even if it is in tiny ways. Keep in touch and thank you for reading.