I have written before about a little book that I think has lots of tips in a small amount pages. Design Your Day, by Claire Diaz-Ortiz, is a great, quick read for organizing your life, rather than just your sock drawer! One of the tidbits that has stuck with me is the creation of one word or thought that is your mantra, your go-to when you feel like you are veering off track. So a couple of years ago I came up with the word “forward” to keep me moving in that direction. I still like that one and I still use it to “right the ship” when I feel like I am off course. But, my life has changed so much in the last few years since I am now well into my sixties and single, I thought it was time to come up with a new word that better defines how I want my life to go in the next year or two. Forward, I am not abandoning you and I want to keep moving that way, and I will always love you as my first word, but it is time to expand my repertoire of directional focus (that sounds like a self-help phrase doesn’t it?).
Goodbye Forward, Hello Goal
When my life was turned upside down and my marriage crumbled after more than thirty years, I constantly felt unstable, like I was walking on a waterbed of the seventies (don’t pretend you don’t remember). Every step was unstable and I was constantly wobbling and falling and having to catch my balance and try to stay upright. I spent a lot of time clinging to the edge. So “forward” gave me a direction and I could keep it in my sights. It helped me to put one foot in front of the other when I could barely move. Fast forward (pun intended) and I am perfectly capable of standing on my own two feet now and need to set the bar a little higher. I need to look ahead farther down the road.
Enter “Goal.” That is my word for 2018. I have given it a lot of thought and while I have moved forward quite nicely, I need more incentive to move to the next stage of life. I am now a fully functional single woman in her sixties, not the weepy sadsack that I was even one year ago. In my head, I am using goal as a verb, not as a thing but as an action. It is not something to achieve, but the act of achieving it. After all, it isn’t the achievement that is important but the getting there that makes it worthwhile, that creates inner growth and gives you that “job well done,” feeling. “Goal me,” is how I will think about it in my head. Kind of a “bring it on,” mentality.
What is Your Word?
During this holiday season, there are often times of sadness, especially if you are a woman who has had to start your life over after fifty, sixty or beyond. So start now, start right now thinking about a word that can help get you one step closer to where you want to be. You will know when you have the right one for you. It will stick in your head and you will revisit it over and over. Then get going. You don’t have to wait for 2018 to get started. However, let me say this: if your word turns out to be a bust, if it just doesn’t fit, guess what, pick another word. “Forward” was not the first word I landed on a year or two ago. I had others but as I put them into practice they just were not right. Be flexible with yourself. After all, it is yourself, your word, your motion.
What is the right word for you? What is the word that is sticking in your head for 2018? And, what will it mean for you in the coming year? I would love to hear from you, not just now, but all year long. I want to know how just one word helps you in your daily life. Believe it or not, one word can make a huge difference.
Elosie says
I looked at this post the other day and went away to try to think of my word.
I’ve come up with PEACE. That’s the feeling I crave – I want to feel peace instead of worry. I worry about my children for different reasons, but for one in particular. Peace would mean that the worries were resolved. That would be nice.
Paula says
I think the saying goes that you can only be as happy as your least happy child. Any mother knows that’s true. I am so sorry that you are worried about one child in particular and I wish you some level of peace, whatever that level is, in the new year. Enjoy your holidays.
Paula says
I love that! Direction, I haven’t heard that before. Now it is time to plan your direction and getting going there! Stay in touch and thank you for reading.
Paula says
I wish you peace, Eloise, and thank you for reading.
Carol Stanley says
Hi Paula I found you on Sixty and Me. I enjoyed your article. ANy suggestions for more networking with sixty plus ladies. I want to help others promote what they want to promote and also get some support myself. Your blog is great and I will take time to read your articles.
Paula says
Carol, thanks for your kind words and for reading. I hope we can all find outlets to get our messages across to women in their best years. I do not have guest writers currently, but if I add them I will let you know immediately. Happy New Year!
Renee says
Hello. Readiing your blog I started. Thinking of my word for 2018. My word is direction. I want to go in another direction.